BEST TF2 FANFIC EVR
by GreasyMeat
Summary: The team is at it again! But this time, love confessions are spreading like maggots over a rotting elderly corpse! (YAOI AND POTTY MOUTH NO-NOs IN STORY NOT SUITED FOR BABIES THAT LIEK YURI)


fortress. !1!7!

Heavy was eatink a sandbitch when medic walked up and smiled "LOL hoovy, mein kinsnzerstck,me and you are like, bffs for ever, mein leibe that is a kinszerstck." (by the way you can't facial expression what you're saying in tf2, BUT THIS ISN'T CANON, LOL H8ERS GUNNA H88888888888) Heavy was more or less sad to hear this because he was (wait for it, and I think you can guess this) fRIEND ZONED!1"c-спасибо doctor, you're my Лучший друг никогда 2" medic smiled and replyed "ja!" and hugs the hoovy, but he stops because he has bodies to cut up. The demopan showed up and said to heavy "I'm black!" and took a chug of his scrumpy. Heavy was annoyed so he crushed the baby demoman's little, little man head with his fists.

Now, this isn't JUST fREAKING ABOUT HOOVY UND MEDICK, we're going to take a peek on the snioper and his shitty, piss-coated, life. SO, the crooked toothed sniper was sitting on his outback, watching his team loose through a scope, as EVERY OTHER SNIPER DOES; when sudenly, the prick assed spaih appered."HON HON HON" the spy honed, "you suck! You live ina van! AH HAHAHAHAHHA!" "ah piss" the sniper replyed. Spy, the turd faced king of turds, smiled devilishly, "boyy...you looking fine in them glasses, mm, where did you get thouse fine~ things?" yeah, thats rhwite, he's hitting on him! contain your nose bleeds sniper was like "crikey! that ass! damn son!" The spaih chuckled at the sniper's lower member. And then, pee pee in poo hole. next chapter

OH what a fawkin' TREAT! It's the scout! let's see what hell he's going to cause "Yo, you suck!" belches the scout (who is LITARALY a bastard) to the soilder on his team. The soilder screaches " YOU SACK Of VOMIT AND SPERM! IMMA CALL AN ADIMAN ON YO' ASS If YOU DON'T STOP YOU wORM Of ANUSES!" (dayyyyymn, Soilder is one mean mofo hubbard) and due to soilder's incapibility to control his blind fury, he gets out his diceplenary action and goes "adimin" on his ass w'it it.

MERASMUS

Merasums is a sad little teddy bear, cuz one, he's dead, and two, soilder dumped his spectral ass!;_; :_( Merasmus was PISSED, he was going to do somthing to make soilder's ass' grasses sassafrasses! Ohhh yeah, he was gunna be a REAL bitch about this. To get back, He stole... The soilder's prized heads! (pfft, i have no idea who in teu fort merasmus thinks he's dealing with) So, now sporting the soilder's heads', all he had to do now is...wait...for 2 chapters.

So, the engie was suntanning with his lushous man titties shimmering in the glow of the sun. Each golden ray of sun illuminated the engie's chest hair...god it was like watching candles on a lake...OMG i wasen't stalking him, what are you talking about?! Anyways, he was taking a break from the whole death and carnge every single muda fuggain DAY! So, the he just sat there, not. giving. a. single. flying. fuck. His sentry is all depressed cuz it ain't killing no juan. So, HE MURDERS DA ENGIE AND DEMOPAN. they don't respawn. they're dead. forever. game over.

Ok, back to merasmus' shit. Soilder came to Merasmus' house, nearly in tears, notice how i said NEARLY in tears, soilder is simply far to mannly to produce the water and salt mixture from his eyes. Merasmus nearly cried to see the Soilder at his home again, he shouted from the window, "solly-poo! I knew you would come back to love me i just kn-" soilder inturupted "Merasmus, save us the shabby, scabby, sappy dispaly, me and litenent bites are not here to hear about your period drama, just give me my god damn heads back, i could SMELL that they where here." Merasums killed soilder's little bitch ass, and kept litenent bites as a pet. "I AM GOING TO KILL ALL THE Tf2 MORTAL fOOLS If it is the VERY last THING i can PUT my SOUL TO!" the wizard spirt swore. feaces is about to get realistic.

The medic and hoovy were in the medic's doc room, heavy was grooming the doves, and the medic was hacking pyro appart for "science". The heavy shyly spoke up from his chore, and said "doctor... i was wondering, could you.. go ou-" there was a loud thud of the door that scilenced the heavy. The little bitch ass prick sucking scunt came in "YO DUDES, you ain't gunna' belive dis, MERASMUS IS HERE! And he is CREAMING our team like cupcakes!" the medic looked overjoyed "there are dead bodies out zere?!" the scout was confused, "uh...yeah, but that's because you don't have your strudel ass out there healing them you deuschbag!" the medic came to his sences "fess...fine, i vill go be the angel of the battle feild...HORRIDO!" he charged upstairs with his medi gun. The heavy picked up his minigun and tried to keep up with the medic.

Merasmus was PMS-ing and causing hell to break loose. The medic was saving lives the best he could, but merasmus was too powerful, oh no! The heavy was shocked and terrifed to see the medic only had 50 health left, he had to do somthing the heavy grabbed the medic and put him somewhere safe to give him a sandbitch. The medic finished eating the snack and healed up. The medic had a amazed look on his face and slowly spoke "heavy... d-danke...ich leibe dich...i truly mean it..." the heavy smiled blissfully, and spoke "i love you too doctor" the smooched. The moment passed and the heavy killed merasmus by using his hand for a gun. Then medick and hoovy had the gay sex.

THE END


End file.
